matilda pick up lines

DOCTOR Harry Wormwood: I want to be in school. The couples and the children overlap the next two verses, as children split themselves among five couples and execute rote choreography. Well done, Bogtrotter. Miss Honey: Did you see all those packages outside? This calls for a proper smoke. Don't sneer at educated people, Mr. Wormwood. When a person is bad, that person has to be taught a lesson! Right. Your old man is going to work. NIGEL Okay, my boy, heir to the throne, today we diddle the customer. "thinking". I've got a plane to catch at three. [sees a painting of Ms. Trunchbull] . She hates it when I go out. We never thought it was possible, The room freezes as MISS TRUNCHBULL starts to write the word "GUILTY" on the board. I'm not hinting, but if you did happen to have a story you wanted . Now sit up and look at the TV. "The books transported her into new worlds and introduced her to amazing people who lived exciting lives. It was the biggest burp I had ever done. Harry Wormwood: Because basically a sentence is just a big bunch of words. Babies! Matilda : I thought grown-ups weren't afraid of anything. The moved into a beautiful old house at the edge of town, and in the evenings, they would walk and take the air. . MR WORMWOOD unwraps the blanket that the baby is swathed in. [off to the side] You're a liar and a scoundrel, and your father's a liar and a cheat, one of the most corrupt lowlifes in the history of civilization! Amanda Thripp: [into recorder] Dad said I'd learn the alphabet! Yes! They embrace and exit out the back of the stage. Matilda, isn't it? Hello! What am doing here? One hundred and fifty-five brand new luxury cars, sir. I am FULLwhen and onlywhen the Headmistress says I am FULL. . Thirteen times two is twenty-six. What can I do? . [appalled at Zinnia talking with FBI agents Bill and Bob] Hanging down by your ears. Look at you trying to hide, silly. "tomato"? A little less brains, a lot more hair. google_color_url="320000"; What do I have to do to gain respect around here? I'm fed up with all this reading! Mr. Wormwood: This miracle . [after Matilda destroys the Wormwoods' TV with her powers] MISS HONEY No one's going to look if you don't stand out. Everybody loves a little something exotic. Oh, my undercarriage doesn't feel quite normal. And if it's not right, Semi-Spanish gown MISS TRUNCHBULL Harry Wormwood: [She murmurs along to the music.] So, Matilda. [to MICHAEL] Get up, boy. And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal, Goofs the Acrobat's sister, a frightening woman who used to be an Olympic-class hammer-thrower, who loved nothing better than to scare the children of the town. There's, erm . But it's a truth empirical The first car your brilliant father sold cost $320. . Oh, no, you are not "full". Stop me when this becomes true, but once upon a time, you and I went on a date. With her, it's all "books" and "stories". Son, one day, you're gonna have to earn your own living. Two, three, four! Only when they deserved it, of course. MATILDA [Matilda uses her powers to slam her bedroom door in Harry's face just as he reaches it]. MATILDA Might have been nice, Dip face! Could I speak to you for a moment, please? His whatchamacallit. [Harry takes his first look at Matilda, grunts, and leaves]. And another door closes. Matilda: AAAHH! NIGEL Mrs. F-F-I. LAVENDER puts the wooden spoon back in his hand. Flipping, filthy, nasty, stupid Russians! Why would she want some snotty, disobedient kid? 19. Amanda Thripp: "I'm right and you're wrong, I'm big and you're small, and there's nothing you can do about it.". You and your father think you can make a fool out of me! Uh, welcome to Wormwood Motors. No! More than one. 3. MR WORMWOOD, towel wrapped about his shoulder, enters the bathroom with MICHAEL. Harry Wormwood: I mean, what else? If you want to throw the hammer for your country. MATILDA And it was the most scrumptious cake in the entire world. Tell me anywhere you'd like to go on a date. [Matilda arrives home from school late at night after Bruce Bogtrotter's encounter with the Trunchbull] All right. ", MATILDA and the ACROBAT'S SISTER [off-stage] You'll be surprised at how well it works. I don't want another one. You'll fit it in. PICK UP LINES! [pointing her riding crop at Amanda] She's probably having a meeting or something and won't want to be interrupted. Look, I don't suppose we could exchange it for a boy, could we? MRS WORMWOOD and RUDOLPHO I invite you to reply with your own cheesy agent pickup lines, as long as they aren't crossing the line of harassment (actually scrapped a Reyna line for that reason). Well? Matilda: 2 0 obj I'll have her for that. What's what, Ms. Trunchbull? They're all mistakes, children! 4. endobj MISS TRUNCHBULL Considerably roomier inside. Matilda: The teacher's clearly falling short. Oh, hello, Miss Trunchbull. What kind of society would that be? A little less zzz, a lot more zing. AMANDA and ERIC I think you'll want your trousers loose. MATILDA Where'd all this come from? A little less flat, a lot more heel. With a little help from us, she could go to university before she . Stand out from the crowd! Of course I am. They're cops, Dad. Hey, Dip face. LAVENDER MISS TRUNCHBULL I mean . MR WORMWOOD Stand up and be proud! I warn you, sir, I want a tight car, because I run a tight ship. Agatha Trunchbull: See more ideas about pick up lines funny, pick up lines cheesy, pick up lines. MAN: Take another picture of our angel from this angle over here. He drops it again. Mrs. C, Mrs. U, Mrs. L-T-Y! Why would you want green hair? Just go up and introduce yourself. Zinnia's on the phone, talking about her kids] Give my little bumblebee her house and her money. [to Michael] The initial impression you make is memorable, so make it count. AAHHH! What do you think might be the cause of this? [She re-enters her bedroom and jumps onto the bed.] Yes, Miss Trunchbull! MATILDA I'll tell you something. Miss Honey: MATILDA picks up various bottles from the vanity and reads from their labels. Like, why is there a "d" in "fridge" but . Oil of Violets hair tonic. I mean, it's got to hurt, all squished in there. . The most beautiful miracle I have ever seen! [suddenly mad, she briskly releases her arm from Miss Trunchbull's grip with her free hand] front bottom. My mummy says I'm a jumped-up little germ, You're going to hug all the air out of me. He's fantastic! Isn't there something you can do? Is like the TARDIS: Here's what I think of your lovely [He starts pulling at the book as though to tear it apart.]. google_ad_host="pub-6693688277674466"; Their furniture is wheeled off the stage and a hat rack with MR WORMWOOD's hat and an umbrella is brought center stage. [They start chattering. google_ad_width=120; MATILDA gazes at their dramatic display non-chalantly and holds out a palm to them. Bunch of hippies and cesspool salesmen, ha ha ha ha Jenny: Every life I bring into this world The condition is characterised by the sufferer experiencing bouts of chronic fatigue, and falling suddenly asleep, often without knowing, or any warning at all. I slave all day, and you're entertaining a couple of surfer dude bodybuilders! Oh no, Headmistress. AAAHH! Someone poured a whole can of syrup onto Trunchbull's chair. Your parents must be so proud to have a girl as clever as you. MRS WORMWOOD But I shan't enjoy it, because of the despicable way in which you have spoken to me tonight. If I were a cat I'd spend all 9 lives with you. Twelve times two is twenty-four. Yes, please. Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, . in my opinion, this little girl should be placed in the top form with the eleven-year-olds! Funny Pickup Lines Woman's Day Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? MATILDA THE MUSICAL. She'll call a truce, Bruce. Before my happy days were over, And you know where you'll end up? You will soon (C) see there's no escaping trageDy. Rules? Oh, I look nice. I'm great! Three times two is six. There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as . Well, this crime took place before school started. I'm gonna sue you, I'm gonna burn down your showroom! From a book in the library. When I left my home, Aunt Trunchbull's home, I had to leave all my treasures behind. MISS TRUNCHBULL takes BRUCE by the wrist and leads him off the front of the stage. A DOCTOR enters. Yesterday, she caught Julius Rottwinkle eating a gobstopper during science. So they say. How does that sound? Agatha Trunchbull: You're the only daughter I ever had, Matilda. 6. . A weakling? [He brings out a load of cash and starts leafing through it.] MATILDA's brother, MICHAEL, lies lazily on a recliner. Zinnia's on the phone, talking about her kids, reciting the words as Matilda magically writes them on the blackboard, to the FBI agents, as they rummage through her parents' garage looking for car parts, He drags Matilda, throwing the book aside, to where Zinnia is, to Michael, who is choking on a carrot Matilida shot at his mouth with her powers, speaking to Matilda about her and her father, accusing Matilda of putting a newt in her drinking water, Matilda uses her powers to slam her bedroom door in Harry's face just as he reaches it, Matilda arrives home from school late at night after Bruce Bogtrotter's encounter with the Trunchbull, snatching the book from Matilda and tears the pages out of the cover, appalled at Zinnia talking with FBI agents Bill and Bob, after Matilda destroys the Wormwoods' TV with her powers, Harry has ordered out of the house the FBI agents, whom Zinnia had just been talking to, she notices that the chocolate box lid is opened and hangs up, she lunges the ball at the door, ultimately puncturing it immensely, she shoves Jenny out of her office and slams the door after her, Jenny enters Ms. Trunchbull's office and almost get struck by a dart, throws carrot from the spoon. Or if the scream in your head even reached your mouth! I love your stories, Matilda! You chose books - I chose looks. What? Your genius husband is going to sell them one hundred and fifty five knackered old bangers as brand-new luxury cars. You are a crook. The DOCTOR exits and MR WORMWOOD hurries after him. Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, A really strong stomach. Before my happy days were Over, MR WORMWOOD One way or another, though, every human being is unique, for better or for worse. Don't put honey on your brother. Merriam-Webster defines a "pick-up line" as "a prepared remark used by a person to start a conversation with a stranger they are interested in having a romantic relationship with". Agatha Trunchbull: . MATILDA stares up at her for several long seconds. What am I gonna do? $5,000? . Let out your belt. Was it magic? Agatha Trunchbull: She puts down the large block and MATILDA stands on it. MRS WORMWOOD Miss Honey: One look at my face and it's plain to see. Yes. Whether you like it or not. I love books. RUDOLPHO starts dancing with and carrying around MISS HONEY, which he continues to do throughout the song. For each correct answer, they'll move one step closer to our Cube of Cash. It's Miss Honey. What you know matters less BIG KID [BEN] MATILDA Students: Matilda's been here all morning. MRS WORMWOOD . Matilda Wormwood: I thought grown-ups weren't afraid of anything. [Looking irritated, she makes her way to BRUCE's side.] Stop! Overall, the best pickup line is one that is creative and original. MATILDA And, while you're at it, why don't you stick your stupid book to your stupid head? MRS PHELPS Jun 15, 2018 - Explore Kristin Wichman's board "Matilda quotes" on Pinterest. [He sits down in a zen position.]. Matilda: You really don't know anything, do you? Knock on the door, Jenny. And remember to be extremely careful. google_ad_client="pub-0578131977065548"; At night, they listened to the silence of their big, empty house, and they would imagine how beautiful it would be if it was filled with the sound of a child playing. I can! No one's gonna tell you when to shake your tush. There's more the second part. See you next week. 4. I'll tell you tomorrow. As long as you dont know it with the volume up. LAVENDER You're heading for the chokey, young lady! Narrator: Are you going to tell me a story or not? Completely different cars, sir. His fingie. That is a promise. I didn't do it. Matilda: Pp6Q &_!Ekp?$w_AG[nU6v^^Wo:9o>:. MR WORMWOOD enters, puffing on a cigarette. ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] Wait, Dad, you're going too fast. B-R-O-O-C-E! . Look. If you're being smart with me, young lady, you're going to be punished. [insulted] . Sell me a lemon? If I let this little girl fall? MRS PHELPS And you won't be getting "right" there, oh no. I hate pigtails! These are some of the best quotes from the fantasy family film Matilda as determined by you and your votes. A spotlight searches the theater. Don't just stand there like a wet tissue. NIGEL For men. 2. Maybe you used some of mummy's peroxide by mistake. I'll come back later, then. Nicholas Nickleby . Sign in|Recent Site Activity|Report Abuse|Print Page|Powered By Google Sites. You gotta get up! I love it here! Harry Wormwood: [loses it, to Matilda] Stop scaring your mother with that book, boy. [He rips the towel off to reveal that his hair is green.] MISS TRUNCHBULL Most parents believe their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. Knock on the door, Jenny. Dinners don't microwave themselves, you know! [bends down] Million $ Sticky Host: I don't know. Once upon a time, the two greatest circus performers in the world an escapologist who could escape from any lock that was ever invented, and an acrobat who was so skilled it seemed as if she could actually fly fell in love, and got married. Get out of it! [She grabs a baton with a yellow ribbon attached to it and starts twirling to the music.] I am *not* seven years old anymore, Aunt Trunchbull! CHILDREN and COUPLES arrange themselves behind it. Harry Wormwood: Zinnia Wormwood: NIGEL Even me. MATILDA You've never set foot in a library. [He throws the phone to the lackey.] Who wants stories? This one was mine. [He finally gives up and straightens up casually.] Loud, loud, loud, loud! Matilda: We're rehearsing. One look at my face and it's plain to see. The guy with the stupid haircut! [she lunges the ball at the door, ultimately puncturing it immensely]. The fibers fused to my hair! Yeah, it was, er [He gestures to the lackey.] What do you want, Miss Chutney? . google_color_text="5F6A72"; Boys and girls! Four judges in outrageous costumes sit behind it. Platinum blonde hair dye. Matilda: My mummy says I'm a miracle. Make him stop! I think we'd better leave it there, Nigel. MATILDA pauses for several moments, holding the dolls in front of her contemplatively. . Agatha Trunchbull: MISS TRUNCHBULL Neigh! . It gives me a warm glow in my lower intestine. The alphabet? Oops! You couldn't spell "difficulty" if your life depended on it. 3. All escapes start with the click of a lock. In fact, it must have been her who put that stink bomb under my desk this morning. Look at mummy. . The seed of a war in the creak of a floorboard. According to a constitutional law book that I read in the library, if you don't have one, you could lose your job or even go to federal prison. MATILDA Looks are more important than books. Whoever painted The Trunchbull must have had a strong stomach. It's not a cheap set, it's a stolen set! This it not your problem. Standing outside the principal's office like a little girl. RD.com. Ah-ah-aah-ah MATILDA sits to the side, reading a book. Patience, my love. Smile for mummy, smile for mother. ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] MR WORMWOOD and MICHAEL exit. . The CHILDREN thrash in their seats. . Sixteen times two is thirty-two. They say it's a cupboard in her office that she throws children into. TOMMY Who you been talking to? Matilda Wormwood: I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. . This clot, this foul carbuncle is none other than a disgusting criminal! [strikes a desktop with her riding crop and all the children instantly face forward] MISS HONEY is left in a pile stage right. MISS HONEY is browsing the stacks. It's just a door. Parents wheeling strollers enter alongside their CHILDREN. [suspicious] Listen to this: "It was the best of times. Miss Honey: Are you smoking a cigarette? MATILDA enters from her bedroom. School? MISS HONEY To survive this mess by being a prince or a princess. It's just that they want that child so very much. ], [She turns and walks back to her desk. . When the hinges creak and the door is closed, Mr. Wormwood: Looks like rain. That is the biggest hug in the world. Oh, right. But unleSs you want to suffer, listen up Harry Wormwood: To read? How much, exactly are we talking about? Agatha Trunchbull: And I will Teach you a thing or two. MISS HONEY Eventually, they quieten down, but LAVENDER continues to jump up in down next to MATILDA, who is reading. If you were six-and-a-half, you'd be in school already. You missed it. MISS TRUNCHBULL . Get up, get up, get out of here, give me that book. You see, unfortunately, Nigel suffers from the rare, but chronic sleep disorder, narcolepsy. She uses the umbrella to bring down the hat and starts lining it with glue.]. See, I know your headmistress. [her car has broken down] Lost your appetite? Cute pick-up lines can help you get past the awkwardness of meeting someone for the first time. Oh my. . No, no, no, no [ad lib. BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. With a little help from us, she could go to university before she . Now get out. MR WORMWOOD runs over and grabs MATILDA's book. And even if you could, BIG KIDS A party entertainer enters with balloons. BRUCE MR WORMWOOD So give me more cake! MR WORMWOOD . See who wins. Hey, dip face. . You could have heard a fly burp. Check it if you don't believe me. Narrator: . Zinnia Wormwood: She holds up the final "10". An idiot? MISS TRUNCHBULL walks heavily toward the coats. Or even two, Bruce, If you sit around and let them get on top, you MISS HONEY knocks three times and winces. It is said that we humans use only a tiny portion of our brains. And so you think you're A-ble Hat seems to be, er . An extraordinary girl with a sharp mind and a vivid imagination takes a daring stand to change her story with miraculous results. MISS TRUNCHBULL sniffs and licks the air. CHILDREN Zinnia Wormwood: No one's gonna tell you when to wiggle your bumba. Refresh the page, check Medium 's site status, or. . . We can have our cake and eat it , Ah-ah-aah-ah Pizza is my second favorite thing that I eat in bed. and . [grabbing and clenching Miss Honey's wrist very tightly in her fist] MISS TRUNCHBULL Six times two is twelve. He's eaten it all. [He takes out a cigar and takes hold of the baby.] You are guilty, because you are a fiend. Hide me! She says if I'm keen, I have to cut down on the cream, MATILDA And so it was, they decided to perform the most dangerous feat ever known to man! MISS HONEY exits off the front of the stage. Told me to watch out for the brat, though; says she's a real wart. Past Alice. FBI Agent Bob: SHUT UP AND LEAVE US ALONE! I mean, it's just not normal for a girl to be all . Some will only be really good at making Jell-O salad. Maybe I shouldn't tell you any more. MISS TRUNCHBULL [He dances backwards and MRS WORMWOOD follows along.]. DOCTOR Agatha Trunchbull: An unhatched tadpole. MISS TRUNCHBULL . Just because you find that life's not fair, it And if you can't read sentences, you've got no chance with books. So he invited the mother's stepsister to come and live with him. Very supple. . MRS WORMWOOD And she keeps trying to tell me stories, Harry. And Even if you put in heaps of eFfort, What? Trunchbull: Not a detail of my throw was adjusted or forgotten. MRS WORMWOOD I think he blinked. And . And . Listen, you little wiseacre: I'm smart, you're dumb; I'm big, you're little; I'm right, you're wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it. Connections But the one thing . The end is happier. . Children are maggots! MATILDA Kim . [to Michael, who is choking on a carrot Matilida shot at his mouth with her powers] [He laughs then peters out.] 9. MRS WORMWOOD What? Just knock on the door. And it's made of spikes and wood. As a huge cloud of chocolate-y gas wafted from my mouth and drifted across the class. Cancelled, because my wife is . Where he's been for the last hour, actually. Now, that is how you do it! And . Between you and it, But she was about to discover she had a strength a strength she wasn't even aware of. Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. 20. I've got my deal today with the Russians. and astronauts! The hat rack is taken away. Can I ask you a question? My daddy says I'm a bore. MISS HONEY, BIG KIDS, and CHILDREN She's reading a book. WOMAN: That's right, honey. MRS PHELPS Narrator: Matilda, that . She laughs. [Matilda comes home from school, excitedly. Michael: The chances of existence almost infinitely small. He got a C on his report! Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, whatever. MATILDA MISS TRUNCHBULL We can't leave valuable packages sitting out on the doorstep. Knock on the door, Jenny. and look at reading. Look at this. My school is a model of discipline! Stupid, nasty, stinking, slimy . I told you that was a cheap set. MRS WORMWOOD brushes past MATILDA with a sound of utter disgust. 'Twas written in the stars before they even met. Oh, yes, she's definitely advanced! She starts the video screens playing again. Er, what books did you read? Jenny: And always keep your feet inside the line! If you sit around and let them get on top, you MRS WORMWOOD Zinnia Wormwood: I swear, I won't take our love for granite. Erm, well, as you know, Matilda is in the bottom class. A little more bah-da, ba ba ba-da bom! I'd love to read to you some time. Agatha Trunchbull: See more ideas about matilda quotes, matilda, quotes. The dumber the act, the bigger the confession. Why? It's not mine! But I think it's good for grown-ups to have their own space. We're told we have to do what we're told, but surely, She says they make me look pretty! We all get carried away sometimes. Trunchbull: MATILDA holds her a dramatic pose, holding the large book above her head. Oh The scene unfreezes. Do you have a job? My daddy says I'm his special little . [chanting with the rest of the class] . It doesn't really matter if you don't know much! But the thing was, I was having a lot of trouble with my belly. [Talking about the cake] And worst of all, when the girl was five, her father died. The story follows Matilda as she interacts with her parents, who fail to see the worth in education, and Crunchem Hall headmistress Agatha Trunchbull.

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